In our romantic relationships, most of us are typically not lucky enough to just stumble and fall upon that one special person that will come out and just be willing to show and prove just how much they’re so in love with you.
Many of us will get caught up in complicated relationships where it may be hard to gauge if someone really loves you or if they’re putting up a front. A lot of us will have to deal with the pain of finding out the fact that your partner doesn’t really love you in the way that they may have mislead you to believe, or that you assumed on your own.
I once fell in love with a woman who gave me the impression that her love for me was as genuine as mines was for hers. But her lack of effort and inconsistency, among other things throughout the relationship, eventually revealed how I was being misled, when I though there was a bond and a love between us.
In some relationships, it can sometimes be hard trying to find clarity when looking to figure out if your partner really loves you.
I has always believed that the popular quote, “actions speaks louder than words”, always rings true in romantic relationships. Although after the experiences in my last relationship, its a must that I add that the patterns and consistency of your partner speaks just as loud.
A person can commit a few actions here and there and can still be putting on an act. Actions, patterns, and consistency, to me are three solid variables that a partner should be consistent with in a relationship if they truly love you.
A disingenuous person might be able to mislead you for a short period of time, but if you pay good enough attention, eventually the truth always reveals itself.
If you’ve noticed there’s been patterns and consistency in the following actions that I’m about to mention in this list, I think it’d be fair to say that you have a real love.
#1 They Make a Genuine Effort to Make the Relationship Work.
If a person truly loves you and wants to be with you, you’ll see it in how hard they try when conflicts arise throughout the relationship. It’s easy to display good behavior when things are all good, but when difficult times and conflicts arise, you’ll be sure to see a persons true colors and intentions.
A person that doesn’t really care for you or the relationship will react as if an issue that can be resolved with communication and patience are burdensome to them.
When a partner really cares about you, they will make a genuine effort to see how they can play a part in helping to resolve and sort out conflicts that arise within the relationship. Not just once or a few times. That person will be consistent and willing to help or contribute to a solution whenever their role or effort is needed.
#2. They Want You to Meet Their Loved Ones
If you’ve been seeing someone for a significant amount of time and that person has never made a conscience effort to try and introduce you to his or her loved ones, chances are you’re not the one, and that person doesn’t have aspirations of you being the one.
A person who’s in love with you, wants all of their family and friends to know about you. They show you off, wanting to introduce you to everyone in their life, particularly their parents. Your partner bringing you around their loved ones on a consistent basis, including holidays and special events is a key indication that they’re looking forward to a future with you.
Someone who doesn’t care about you will not care to introduce you to their family and friends, and will make excuses as to why they don’t want to.
#3 They Want To Meet Your Loved Ones
A person that truly loves you, although they may be somewhat nervous about the meeting, will not hesitate to want to meet your loved ones.
A few years ago I was in a relationship, where I was in love with my then girlfriend, who gave me the impression that she was also in love with me. There were two separate occasions when she was hesitant on meeting my family at the Thanksgiving dinner that they had planned. I hadn’t realized how much of a red flag it was back then, but I eventually understood that her looking to avoid meeting my family was just one of many tells that exposed how she was not truly in love with me. About a month after that Thanksgiving holiday, she gave me a vague excuse as to why she was breaking up with me.
A person who does not have plans for you in the future will typically not want to meet your loved ones. They’re careful to not form an attachment or have to force or fake any relationships that are basically an extension of you.
It’s hard enough for them to already be faking the relationship that they have with you, let alone having to add additional people. A partner that makes excuses not to meet your loved ones, may indirectly be letting you know that they don’t necessarily have plans to stay with you in the future, which should be taken as an obvious translation that they don’t really love you.
A person that loves you, will at the least, express interest in wanting to know or meet your loved ones at some point.
#4 They’re Willing To Make Sacrifices
A sacrifice can basically be regarded as giving up one thing for another thing that is far more important. Or the release of something in your possession for something else that you love.
A persons willingness to make a sacrifice for you is a telltale sign that they love you. There’s nothing that reveals how much a person is not for you more than how selfish they will show you that they are when dealing with you.
A person who loves you is all about you. As long as requests and expectations are reasonable, a partner should not have issues making sacrifices for their spouse or relationship.
#5 They Make Effort to Help You
A person that loves you won’t be limited to just telling you that they love you, but it’ll show from their actions.
He or she can say ‘I love you’ a million times a day, but if their actions aren’t matching what they’re saying, how valuable are their words? The person that loves you, has no qualm with showing their love through their actions, especially during the rough and stressful times that we need the support of our partners the most.
If someone doesn’t love you, they won’t care to make the effort to help you. Actions will always speak louder than words.
#6 They Talk and Think About the Future
A person that truly loves you, will want you around, not just in the near future but also in the long run. So in return when they talk about and are making plans for the future, most times out of ten, they’re always trying to include you in it.
It’s cool to be included in events in the near future, like the cool concerts they’d want you guys to go to, and the popular new movie that they want to watch with you when it comes out, but when you’re partner wants you to be a part of the plans like buying and living in a house in the future, and travelling to different destinations in the upcoming years, it’s a strong sign that this person really loves you and probably wants to be a part of everything that’s revolved around seeing you happy with them for a long time.
. . .
Real love won’t have you guessing and overanalyzing your relationship to try and determine whether or not your partner really loves you.
When a person really loves you, more than likely you’ll know. It will come off genuine from your partner and for the most part, feel effortless to deal with.
When you’re confused as to whether or not a person really loves you, especially after a substantial amount of time, it’s probably time to take into consideration that this person is playing mind games and is probably stringing you along.
True love is expressed through the actions of the individual that you’re getting it from, and the patterns and consistency of these actions should prevail throughout the relationship. That’s the type of love that can keep and sustain a healthy relationship.
“”Love without passion is like a body without a soul”